In 2006 Randy Roecker expanded his dairy near Loganville, Wisconsin, to 300 cows. But a few years later the price of milk plunged, throwing the family operation – Roecker’s Rolling Acres, LLC – into a financial tailspin. Roecker’s emotions took a deep dive, too.
“I got depression really bad,” he says, “and I couldn’t find anybody who was able to help me. I was seeing a therapist; I was taking medication, but I still felt like I was fighting depression all alone. I kept taking overdoses; every day, I wanted to die.”
But time passed, as Roecker cobbled together his life, his emotions, and kept going, still fighting depression while working alongside his parents, son, daughter, and son-in-law to keep the dairy on its feet.
Little changed – until December 2018. Then came a turning point. “My neighbor Leon Statz, also a dairy farmer, committed suicide,” says Roecker. “That took me back to where I was 10 years before.”
Soon after, Roecker finally opened up to his church family at St. Peter’s Lutheran Church, sharing perhaps what he might have shared years before: “I started crying and said – speaking for both Leon and myself, ‘You don’t understand how this is for us.’ And they were shocked to hear the depth of our despair as farmers.”
The exchange galvanized the congregation as well as Roecker’s resolve to do something constructive with the pain he and Statz had suffered. He reached out to Brenda Statz, Leon’s widow, along with his therapist and Dale Meyer, a leader in the church. He told them, “I want to put together a support group for farmers.”
With the support and input of those trusted people, plans for the first meeting took off; the news spread. Other local agencies, like Saulk County Extension, got involved, and soon the first meeting of an informal support group for farmers was a reality. The event was held in the church, with Meyer using his networking avenues to spread the word.
“Fifty people attended that first meeting,” says Roecker. “One farmer drove three hours to get to it. We had speakers lined up, and we also had a time when we went around the table and people were encouraged to share their stories.”
Following the same format, the group held three or four meetings a year. Then, they broadened their focus and discussion topics, evolving into a local organization called Farmer Angel Network.
The national media got wind of the meetings and their purpose. National news stories and television segments have since helped Roecker spread the word about farmers in distress.
The core of his message is simple, giving each of us a role to play in helping to alleviate the emotional distress of others:
“Listen!” he says. “Listening is so important! I have people reach out to me all the time; they cry, and they talk. They don’t know what to do, where to turn for help, because nobody takes the time to listen anymore.”
Farmers potentially play an especially needed role in listening to other farmers, says Roecker. The empathy of our peers is a helpful role even therapists are ill-equipped to fill.
He says: “I have told my therapist, ‘You’re wonderful; but you don’t understand farming.’ We farmers have this legacy that complicates our distress. Ours are special circumstances, and it helps to talk to other farmers who have gone through what we’re going through.”
It’s for that very reason that Argyle, Wisconsin, corn-and-soybean farmer Jeff Ditzenberger started his nonprofit group called TUGS (Talking, Understanding, Growth, and Support). “Hurting people just want someone to talk to,” he says.
Ditzenberger should know. Thirty years ago, as a Navy veteran recently returned from a tour of duty in the Gulf, Ditzenberger suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder compounded by bipolar disorder, depression, and alcohol.
“I tried to find help, but it was hard to get an appointment to see a doctor,” he says. “I tried reaching out to friends, but they didn’t want to talk about feelings. All they had to offer was something like, ‘It’ll get better.’ Or worse yet, ‘Suck it up, Buttercup.’ ”
In desperation, Ditzenberger attempted suicide by setting an abandoned house on fire while he was inside. But inexplicably, he found himself unable to follow through with his plan and walked from the building unscathed. The effort, which of course involved breaking laws, landed him in a psychiatric treatment center. Medication and therapy followed.
Ditzenberger’s journey toward recovery later garnered speaking engagements, and along with a therapist’s influence, these events gave him the idea to launch TUGS. His Navy days inspired the group’s name as he recalled how tugboats come alongside ships to help them navigate.
“Like tugboats helping ships, people can help people,” he says.
Ditzenberger launched TUGS with the help of a friend, Scott Gollackson. They reached out to a core group of individuals to put together a board of directors. The board includes a social worker, an individual representing veterans’ affairs, and an individual with experience relating to drug-and-alcohol-abuse issues.
Aimed at helping farmers and somewhat modeled after Alcoholics Anonymous, TUGS holds meetings on a flexible schedule. Guest speakers address issues relevant to the group, and the agenda welcomes sharing of personal experiences.
“We’re not a therapy group,” says Ditzenberger. “But we offer a safe place to go for those who are struggling with emotional issues. And the speakers are people they can reach out to for further discussion or guidance.”
Beyond founding TUGS, Ditzenberger also supports people in mental distress through speaking engagements and the daily messages of hope he sends out on Snapchat.
“You don’t have to have a PhD to help someone,” he says. “You can help simply by being kind. Ask questions if you suspect someone needs help. Ask if they need someone to talk to. Take a home-cooked meal, a home-baked pie to your neighbor. If you think they’re in distress and falling behind on work, ask if you can help by mowing their lawn, for instance.
“Or, you might be that person they need to talk to,” says Ditzenberger. “You can make a difference in someone’s life just by being kind.”
LEARN MORE
Randy Roecker
608/393-2472
Jeff Ditzenberger
608/214-9137
It wasn’t until I moved to the Central Coast of California, a big strawberry growing region in a state that grows 88 percent of American-grown strawberries, when I discovered that the reality of strawberry production was less idyllic than I thought. The problem with strawberries has to do with pesticides. Year after year, the Environmental Working Group lists strawberries as one of the “Dirty Dozen,” which are the 12 fruits and vegetables with the highest pesti
Far from the bucolic, soil-stained picture of farmers past, today’s agriculture is heavily influenced by technology. Sometimes, that can make things a little…weird. AT&T recently announced a partnership with smaXtec, an Austrian company that makes a sensor bundle that’s designed to be swallowed by cows. Modern dairy farming is a game of margins; dairy farmers in the United States have long been propped up by government contracts and nutrition guidelines, but suppl
If you’ve overwintered your dahlias, May is the time to plant them out in the garden. While you can plant dahlia tubers directly into the soil, it’s good to give them a head start under glass, before hardening off and planting out in late May – learn how to pot up dahlia tubers in spring. More on growing dahlias: How to grow dahlias Orange dahlias to grow How to store dahlias and cannas over winter When you get to planting your dahlias in the ground, leave 15cm to 45cm between plants, depend
By planting out lettuce throughout summer, you can ensure a continuous supply of fresh salad leaves. You can grow your own young plants from seed or buy them from nurseries and garden centres. Lettuce makes an ideal quick crop to grow between other vegetables before they mature, or at the front of flowerbeds and in pots. You Will Ne